OCD

Okay, I admit, this one has been on my other blog before.  But I ran out of poems I wanted to post, so I'm putting this one on here.  It was one of my favorites I've written.  This is why I want to go into psychology.  I just love it. 

Silence all around you, voices begging in your head

Begging for death, for it all to stop, no more pain-

But it all continues-

The pain, the misery, the hell on earth

Incomparable, not understandable by any outside

The padded walls that line your mind

taking in the silent screaming that begs

for death, for it all to stop, no more pain..

There are no choices, only the driving compulsions

“not worthy, not worthy, never enough for her”

No happiness, no relief, no end to all the misery

Waiting for some sort of reprieve,

A release, some God-given way out

The days drag on with only disquiet

The small voice in the back of your mind-

“not worthy, not worthy, never enough for anyone”

Let it end-make it stop-the continual cry

For help, for love, for someone to try

Can’t change these feelings, rooted so deep

Eating, decaying, destroying all inside

Happiness was all you wanted, a chance to shine

But this curse, this gift, this hell on earth

Kills all in sight, destroys any light

You cry at night to someone, to anyone

For help, for love for someone to try…

You wait in the darkness.  Silence surrounds.

First one ray, then others will pierce through the night

Hope trickles in like rain in a desert

A hand pulls you up from the black of your mind

Another joins, then another and another

Till you break through the shadows

The daylight streams in, destroying all that blinds you

The journey is over-you’ve made it at last

The enemy’s defeated, humiliated, destroyed

No longer will sadness and gloom pervade

Your mind is your own, your choices to make

Lift up your head, break through and shine

It’s your day, it’s your time